I hate you

I love you

More than I ever knew

Not what I intended to do

Played with fire and I got burned

But sometimes pain’s the way to learn

Messed around with the way people felt

And felt the impact of what I’d dealt

I’m calm

I’m insane

You’re storm of silence

With that look of defiance

Like gazing through ice

I should’ve thought twice

Play with emotions and they’ll bite you back

Faking it gets you knocked clean off the tracks

Get away from me

I  want you

It’s a roller coaster ride

Turning tables and changing sides

I can’t breathe but I still don’t

Understand why I won’t.

I thought I was clever conjuring my lies

Dancing you on strings and controlling your ties

Never want to see you

I miss you

It’s crazy I know

This confusion, this chaos about letting go

Just one little match I set the forest on fire

Just one little act I set us burning down with desire

It’s always night now and everything’s blue

Would you believe it if I really felt something with you?

I can’t stand you

I need you

Some parts weren’t an act at all

Because I really did fall

For you

Thought you knew

That part wasn’t a lie

I know it’s too late to apologize

But before you leave me

I just want to say I’m sorry





I just sang a song about love that I don’t believe in

When we broke apart we never broke even

And I watch you with her and I watch you in pain

But you won’t admit for the world that you feel the same

But I’ll swallow my pride and I’ll take the blow

Because I think deep down both of us know

She’s not gonna tear you apart whenever you fight

And I promise now she’ll never break you right

And what am I supposed to do?

What I always needed was always you

What do you want me to say

When I dream of you every day?

And how can you not want things back the way they were

‘Cause I can see you’re faking a smile with her

And you say I’m crossing a line

But I see you watching me when it should be her time

And you now say anything you wanted

But the look in your eyes says you’ll always be haunted

And she’s never met a boy like you

Bet she can’t break you the way I do

She can’t make you smile for real

She can’t guess the way you feel

She doesn’t know your favorite songs

And you don’t both laugh and sing along

She doesn’t know your hopes and dreams

How you’re so much more than what you may seem

She can’t make you fall in love

Can’t leave you looking for shooting stars above

And I bet if worst came to worst

If she left you it wouldn’t even hurt

And I once upon a time you knew

That I was the perfect girl for you

And if you have a broken feeling in your chest

That burst inside when I left

Then that means that you’re not free

It means you’re still in love with me

And trust me it’s the little things that give it away

The way that I can see you’re hurting but you tell her you’re okay

So don’t say goodnight

‘Cause she’s not gonna break you right 



via Daily Prompt: Shiver

ice_heart_by_mikrox-d5m6pt1I can feel your heart

Breaking apart

I can feel your eyes

Full of a hope that slowly dies

And I can feel your hands

Grasping for something you don’t understand

And I’m sorry that this happened to you

Not what I intended to do

But when you almost walked away

That had it’s own price to pay

And I had to keep myself together

Because I knew we wouldn’t last forever

So you got what you give

As I searched for an alternative

And now you call me up on my phone

And you beg me to not leave you alone

And you said that you’d never let me go

And I know

And I watch tears stream down your face

As your world falls out of its place

And you say that you never knew I could be this cold

… So you were never told?

And you keep on asking me why

And I can hear you cry

But I don’t listen

I keep it all within

And my heart breaks a little

A tiny fracture down the middle

As I leave you behind

But you should know that it was time

And I know you hate this- I do too

But it’s time I moved over you

And you say that you should’ve looked twice

Because you never knew I could be as cold as ice

And around you the snow starts to fall

As I leave you once and for all

And you begin to drown in a freezing dark river

As all I give you in the end is a shiver







via Daily Prompt: Mistake

Last night I stayed up too late

Wondering just how much my heart could break

Thinking that maybe all along

Since the beginning you’d already moved on

And I’d begged you for one chance

Thinking I was living a dream romance

And reality took a while to dawn

When I finally realized it was me who was wrong

And you’d left but I’d done the rest

I’d left this  bleeding hole in my own chest

I’d had a lot of hope riding on you

That you’d be the one to break through

The barrier I’ve built over myself, this wall

That I gradually began to let fall

But I should’ve left it where it was

Foolishness is what foolishness does

And I thought we could work out

But then I realized that’s not what your goal was about

You just wanted to play a few games

Wanted to watch me go through all this pain

Wanted to bit by bit break me apart

Wanted to know how far you had to go to break my heart

And I bet you’re laughing at me

About how gullible I can be

But you know what? Thank you

For showing me just what you do

Because now I know that I was better on my own

I was meant to be alone

And I don’t need anyone

In the end it was me who won

Because you’ll always need to keep playing

Running away and never staying

But now I know that I can be free

So just stay away from me

Because I’m not lonely when I’m without you

I am stronger than you ever knew

It was never really your fault it was mine

For letting you across all my lines

It was my fault that I fell for your tricks

Believing your lies to be some kind of magic

And it was my fault but now I’m awake

I know I was my own mistake

And now I’m smarter, stronger than before

I can turn my back and slam the door

And one day everyone will see you’re a fake

And I’ll watch you collapse from the weight of your mistakes




pushyavia Daily Prompt: Ghost

Lights go down

Too dark to see

Silence falls over this town

And I hear you calling to me

Close my eyes

Try to let you go

But I’m just living a lie

And both of us know

I’ll be haunting you

Just like you do to me

I wish both of us knew

It wouldn’t be easy

And tonight in some other place

Do you lie awake in the night?

Remembering my face

After that fight

I can’t lose you

The memories just won’t go away

A mist I can see through

Whispering the things I didn’t say

And every time the lights die

I keep thinking your name

It’s written in stars across the sky

I think I’m going insane

You’re what takes me apart

You’re what I regret the most

You’re the other half of my heart

You’re my ghost

And I wonder right now

If you’re thinking of me

If you’re chained down and how

You’ll ever get free

I wonder if you’ve moved on

If you’re with someone knew

But one thing I’ve known one thing all along

When you try I’ll haunt you

Will it be like this forever?

Constantly reliving memories?

Remembering when we were together

Then drowning in a sea?

And whispers and secrets

Go away when comes dawn

And the ghost of regret

Is suddenly gone

But when it’s the middle of nighttime

In the midst of daggers and screams

I swear I can feel your mouth against mine

Or maybe it’s just crazed dreams

I swear I can feel you at my side

Your whisper, your hands

I could run away, I could hide

And it changes nothing, I don’t understand

And somewhere in the world

You keep seeing me and you keep turning away

You try to find another girl

But I’m after you after the day

And I smile to myself, staring out at the sea

Waiting for the night to come to be your host

Waiting for you to come to me

And tonight I’ll finally be free of my ghost










When our story had just begun

We had it all

Now you say that you’re done

Arms crossed as you lean on the wall,

Suitcases, goodbye

As you leave me behind

Breathe deep, don’t cry

But I can’t help flashing back in time,

We used to be happy, when we were together

We used to dance under the stars

We used to make promises about forever

And now you leave me with all of these scars,

You caught my attention with your good looks and charm

And we fell in love and made plans for a home

I used to be safe in your arms

And now you leave me all alone,

And now, years later, I think back to that day

When you said the dream had died

Packed up, drove away

I felt like my feelings had lied,

And I’ve been struggling, trying

To work this out in my head

But I keep telling myself half- truths and lying

And I wish for you instead,

I keep wondering- was it my fault things turned out this way?

There’s a steady stream of questions flooding through my brain

I keep thinking of things to say

But no excuse can block tides of pain,

One moment it hurts so much it burns

The next I hardly have a regret

And all in all I learn

That it won’t be long before I can’t keep this a secret,

I keep denying it all

But I don’t know what to do

Summer’s gone to fall

And I think I’m still in love with you,

Can we just reverse our tracks?

Go just a few minutes back in time

Can we just change things and  go back

When everything was good and fine?

I can’t forget how it was before

And I watch your car drive away

I want so bad the way we were

And I think I finally know what to say,

So I run after your car

Watch you stop in surprise

Because I know it hasn’t gone too far

Beyond the night there’s a sunrise,

And as you roll down your window

I know we can end up okay

So before you go

This is what I didn’t say.








A story just begun

A bird just in flight

Blue sky


You’re why

There are now just deep red scars

You blocked off the light

Shot down the bird

Made this place dark as night

With just a couple of words

You didn’t even see

I was in love

Threw that blow on me

And now it’s all “I was

I was innocent

I was a thousand words unspoken

Before you went

And got my heart all twisted and broken

I shouldn’t have left the pages of that book

Out for you to see

Didn’t bother to read it- not even to look

Before you walked out on me

I was a flower

All ready to open

Shouldn’t have left it in your power

To take me out with one motion

I gave you my heart

Then you brought my high to its crash

Tore me apart

Tossed it all in the trash

So now here I stand

Writing down how I feel

You had my heart in your hand

But you claimed it wasn’t real

Three words would’ve done it

Three words meant it all

But the wrong three words hit

The wrong three words caused my fall

I guess I can’t blame you

For this empty space

It was my fault too

I shouldn’t have given you my heart in the first place

And now you’ve moved on- but please just know

Treat your next strike- off better

Watch the places you go

At least leave your next try a letter

You never did that for me

Say how you feel

So at least they can see

The heart you claimed you have’s real

That somewhere under that ice

Something under that cold

Even if you have to look twice

There’s still a shimmer of gold

Watch what you say

Be careful because

Maybe you can change your ways

If you remember before you what I was





People mess up and say the wrong things

People try and apologize

They don’t know what kind of pain they can bring

Weaving nets of lies

But  this is my hope for me and you

That even though you walked away

You’ll think things through

And one day…

One day maybe you’ll wake up and you’ll realize

I really am sorry

It wasn’t an act when I cried

And you’ll come back to me

And you I know I’m waiting right here

I’m not moving on

You forgetting all about me is my greatest fear

And I loved you all along

And I’ll wait till I die

If that’s what it takes

This isn’t a lie

Just let me fix my mistakes

And every day I’ll be here at the corner of the street

Because I know you’ll know

This was the place we last promised to meet

And it’s the first place you’ll go

If you’re looking for me

Because one day I hope with everything I have

That you’ll finally see

You’ve still got my heart’s other half

And one day I hope that you’ll miss me too

And you won’t move on yet

Because you know I’m still missing you

And you’re my biggest regret

It should’ve worked fine

You’re my whole world- my whole galexy

And deep down you’re still mine

You’re the universe to me

And I’m not giving up, I’m standing my ground

You’re my light and my love

Even when they gather around

Laughing because

They say you’re not coming back

I should just forget

Get my life back on track

But I’ll tell you a secret

They can throw all their bombs and blows

But I don’t care what they say, they just don’t see

Because they don’t know

I know you’re coming back for me…

One day




You say that it’ll be okay

That you have nothing I can’t see

You say you’d give it all away

Just for me

But there’s things I don’t know

And there’s things you don’t know and I

Know we’ve finally crossed a line

Found a knife sharp enough to sever these ties

Because it’s been one too many lies this time

You say let’s try and work this out

That it can all turn out alright

But that’s not what this is about

And you’re battling a losing fight

Sometimes when you hit a wall

You have to back it up

When you take a fall

You need to know when enough’s enough

And some things were just not meant to be

Like two words with no rhyme

And eventually you’ll see

That it’s been one too many mistakes this time

Say something wrong and there’s no backspace

No eraser, no way to say sorry

There’s better way to lose your place

Then to not know how to speak an apology

And there’s been one too many times when I’ve questioned if this was right

There’s been one too many lies

There’s been one too many other names circling the night

One too many storming skies

One too many secret tears

One too many dark secrets

One too many deep, hidden fears

And there’s no way out unless

We end what’s begun

We walk our own ways

We accept that it’s done

“Nothing gold can stay”

And sometimes wills bend

And fires will light

And sometimes things end

And you have to do what’s right

And sometimes you realize your mistakes

And sometimes you have to fix it all

And sometimes hearts break

And you have to catch yourself when you fall

And then you have to lift your head

Even when you know you were wrong

You have to look past night and see the starlight instead

And have to take a deep breath and be strong

And I’m sorry for this

I know for now you don’t understand

And I promise

That one day you can

Because there’s been too much rain

And too many regrets

There’s been too much pain

And there’s been one too many secrets






The promises he’d spoken

Were so easily broken

And what he told me then

Was all a lie so I started over again

And you and I were what I’d begun

And you’re golden and fire burning bright as the sun

And I thought I was happy, thought I’d moved on

All the girls were jealous and I thought nothing could ever go wrong

But he’s still somehow stuck in my head

And I keep thinking of things I could’ve said

And he is everything that I regret

So I did my best to forget

And now I’m stumbling drunk on the street calling out his name

And your eyes fill up with so much pain

And you tell me the name I whisper in my sleep isn’t yours

And I try to lose my life from before

And this whole thing is so much deeper than it seems

And somehow you’re not the one who’s in all of my best dreams

And I hate my feelings for what they do

Because I’m still in love but not with you

I go over and over his goodbye

I wish he’d never left and I don’t know why

Because you’ve been there every single time

You’re the best thing that was ever mine

And you’ve held me every time I’ve cried

And there’s a whole war going on inside

And you’re the one who deserves my heart

So why am I being torn apart?

It’s like I’m being ripped in two

Because I’m still in love but not with you

And if you looked in my heart than you could see

Why I never say it back when you say you love me

And I don’t deserve all those sweet things you’ve done

And that’s why neither side has won

And when I tell you all this you say you know

And you tell me you’ll love me even if I let you go

And that hurts so much to hear

Because it confirms my biggest fear

Because you say you’ll always be right there

And I’m stuck in the middle and can’t go anywhere

And I think that it’s killing me inside

Because when I see you crying in secret I die inside

And he left me all alone

So why do I feel like with him I’m finally at home?

And I don’t know how I can pull through

Because I’m still in love but not with you